World of Vir-Chew-All: Chow Faktree History

Messaje frum the Hed ChowTester

Hey Gang! Boey heer...yer Hed ChowTestur at the Vir-Chew-All Chow Faktree. I kant tell ya how prowd I am ta be heer .

Ya see, it wuzzent alwayz lyke this...bafore the now-famuss buss-trip, we wuzzent even ChowTesters...we wuz jest a bunch uv fun luvvin critterz.

I won't roowin the storee for ya...but ...well..durrin the buss trip, and aftur that liddul mattur in Bakurzfeeld I dasided that mebbie it wud be bettur tew faxx owr rezzymayz and stuff tew the Chow Faktreez, insted uv tryin to drive to eech wun, sew, on Jooly the thurd, 1994...I rote this faxx:

URGENT FAXXX

To: Alla Chow Faktreez
From: Kitties wantin to be chowtesters

Dear Chow Faktreez,

I reprazent a group uv verree gud kitties who are tryin' rill hard to find gainfull imploymint as chow-testers. We ar all rill expertz at eating chow an treetz. We got bout a hunnerd yeerz combind expeereeunce eatin awl kindza chow. We are prolly tha mostest willing chow-testers yer fine cumpanee cud eber hope ta find inna millyun yeerz, rilly! Weev tryed alla chow an we knoe whut kitties like, we tokk bout chow a lot! Shute, we eben DREEM bout chow! Whut better imployeez cudya want??

We will be faxxxin yew ar rezzamayz rite away. We rilly wanna bee gud kittizens an get rill jobs so our famaleeze can be rill prowd ov us all. We gotta van an we can all bee thair wheneber you want. Pleeze faxxx us back wiff innervyew times, ok??

Sinceerlee,
BO

Oh, how we werried an fussd. And then, jest wen we wuz aboud tew gibb up hoap...we reseeved dis faxx:

VIR-CHEW-ALL CHOW FAKTREE
Ether City
Call: O-EAT-LOTSA-CHOW-ALLATIME

July 7, 1994

Dear Mr.Bo:

Thank you for your interest in Vir-Chew-All cat foods. We make very fine foods for cats (and every other critter) and the very best treats in the world.

We are very interested in you and the group you represent. Most of our current chow-testers are getting ready to retire. They have all been with us many years, as we have virtually no employee turnover here. There will be a wonderful retirement ceremony for them, during which they will receive a gold bowl and have their lab coats retired to the ChowTester Hall of Fame.

We have reviewed your resumes and find you to be the kind of cats we are seeking. please let us know when you would like to come for interviews.

Very truly yours,

Mrs.Felix, owner

So...that iz how the ChowTesters got dere first job!

We hope yew enjoy yer trip trew dis wurld of ours. Chek da treetz we offer an de toyz, an doan fergit sumting spesshul stuff fer yer hooman!

Boey
Hed ChowTester

P.S. NOW REVEALED: The secret entrance to the meadows of the Rainbow Bridge!